DEBT CRISIS
The most honest comment I’ve heard on solving the global debt crisis came from the prime minister of Luxembourg, a tiny European country wedged between Belgium, France and Germany.
He said “We know how to solve the debt crisis. We just don’t know how to do it and get re-elected.”
That view probably sums up the thoughts of politicians worldwide. Until the politicians begin to put their country before themselves this problem is unlikely to be solved. Sigh.
An interesting approach to the same problem was made by an Australian economist. His solution was to give money to everyone: those people with debt had to use the money to pay off or reduce their debt; those without debt could spend their money freely, although it could not be used for speculative investments.
He reasoned that providing money to the banks, as in the past, would not generate jobs or stimulate growth, but by getting people to spend, the world’s economies would begin once more to grow.
I like his thinking. I’d love to get a decent handout from the government. Who wouldn’t? To turn JFK’s immortal words on end, “ask what your country can do for you.”
NO BARS ON FIELDS?
A friend who knows people who matter in Angeles City, recently reported an interesting conversation. In the next three to five years there will be no bars along Fields Avenue.
The reason behind this view is that the bars are a blight on our fair city: and once Clark becomes fully operational, government does does not want them, and certainly not in so prominent a location. This may be a reason the bar raids are ongoing, resulting in bar closures and sales as owners and investors figure the risks outweigh any rewards. Especially if a spell in jail is involved.
I can see the logic behind the argument, although it’s quite possible the bars will simply move to Malabanas Road and/or other back streets. The proposed timing of three to five years may be a little ambitious but I understand wanting to move the ‘entertainment precinct’ to a less obvious location.
The city government is likely to raise more revenue from airport-related development and increased tourism than it ever could from the bars, meaning owners and operators will not succeed in resisting a move by playing the ‘money’ card. Oh dear.
ENGLISH FROM AROUND THE WORLD
When travelling we periodically come across versions of mangled English. These signs and notices appeared in various places, as you will see, proving that a lack of proficiency in English is not limited to one country or region.
Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:
WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS.
Temple, Bangkok:
IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER, IF DRESSED AS A MAN.
Cocktail Lounge, Norway:
LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.
Dry Cleaning Shop, Bangkok :
DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS.
Restaurant, Nairobi:
CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER.
Main road to Mombassa, Kenya :
TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE.
Poster, Kencom Inc:
ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO WE CAN HELP.
Restaurant, City:
OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS.
Cemetery:
PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES.
Hotel, Tokyo :
GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS IN BED.
Restaurant, Switzerland:
OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR.
Bar, Tokyo:
SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS.
Hotel, Yugoslavia:
THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID.
Hotel, Japan:
YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID.
Hotel, Moscow:
YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY.
Black Forest, Germany:
IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE.
Hotel, Zurich:
BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE.
Donkey Ride, Thailand:
WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?
Laundry, Rome:
LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME.
MASSAGE WORLD RECORD FOR ANGELES?
I can think of a number of reasons why our fair city may be notorious, but an attempt by 447 masseurs and masseuses, from the Philippine Association of Licensed Massage Therapists (PALMT), on a world record isn’t one of them. PALMT is awaiting verification by representatives from the Guinness Book of Records.
This is tied in with the Department of Tourism, (DoT), attempts to promote medical tourism via the wellness industry. Director, DoT Region III, Ronaldo Tiotuico, was confident the world record would propel the wellness industry to greater heights as the DoT capitalizes on “fitness fever by positioning the country as the most likely destination for treatment, healing, and recovery.” He also revealed there are over 100 spas and resorts offering ‘wellness solutions’ spread throughout Pampanga. »» MASSAGE WORLD RECORD FOR ANGELES?
HOME ALONE
Finally got home around midnight Saturday, almost 24 hours after we rolled out of bed. It took so long as we’d planned to stop in Singapore for a few days, which we subsequently cancelled, and flew both legs (SYD-SIN and SIN-MNL) on the same day.
Singapore Airlines did everything well and everything worked as it should: entertainment systems, food, service, courtesy and, in a first for us, checking in and selecting our seats on-line. The airline formalities at Sydney Airport were limited to checking our bags through to Manila and collecting boarding passes for both flights.
The organised chaos of arriving in Manila, such as people jostling for position in the lines facing the Immigration desks, was almost welcome as we were simply pleased to be home. There was no trouble finding the car and driver we’d booked from Margarita Station online and this is a better and less expensive option than grabbing a ‘coupon’ taxi from the arrivals section of NAIA.
Our visit to Sydney was marred by the mysterious death, in Angeles, of our beloved dog Rocky, an eight year old German Shepherd. In time we’ll get over it, but hell his absence is torture, especially as we were not here when his need for us was greatest and we feel guilty about that. ‘Lady L’ is devastated.
If we harboured any doubts as to just where in the world we are, these were put to rest by the brownouts last night: a series of rolling two-three hour outages between 7:00pm and 6:00am. Only in the Philippines.
QANTAS
Poor industrial relations used to be a millstone around the neck of business in Australia. Then as successive governments weakened the power of trade unions which led to a decline in union membership, work-days lost to industrial disputes plummeted.
QANTAS, Australia’s leading international and domestic airline, has been involved in a year long fracas with three main unions – the pilots, engineers and baggage handlers. This led to the grounding of the airline’s entire fleet at 5:00pm AESST last Saturday damaging the country’s reputation as a tourist destination, damaging the QANTAS brand and stranding 78,000 passengers worldwide.
The three unions involved want job security. QANTAS is not in a position to offer job security and remain viable; indeed, QANTAS’ premium international network as is reportedly losing $200million annually. I suspect there’s not a privately owned company in any industry anywhere in the world that can guarantee job security. If employees want job security they should work for the government.
In an effort to reduce overheads controversial CEO, Alan Joyce, wants to move the airline’s cost centre to Asia over the next five years. The unions demand that pilots and crew employed by Qantas’s offshore subsidiaries receive the same pay and conditions as their Australian counterparts which, to my mind, defeats the purpose of relocating an operations centre or two to Asia.
”I am absolutely confident that nothing that comes through the negotiations [with unions before Fair Work Australia] will restrict us in setting up an Asian carrier.” Under the Fair Work Australia ruling the airline and the unions have 21 days to reach agreement or the whole sordid issue will be sent to arbitration.
”The future of us turning around the international business is for us to participate in Asia,” Mr. .Joyce said.
Mr. Joyce wants to compete in Asia by slashing Qantas’ labour bill on international routes, making it more in line with Singapore Airlines, Cathay Pacific, Emirates etc. I don’t think it’s quite that simple as QANTAS has an aging fleet of aircraft compared to Singapore Airlines and Cathay Pacific and, in my experience, poorer customer service relations.
Under his five-year blueprint, Qantas will launch an ultra-premium airline – likely to be called RedQ or OneAsia – in Singapore or Kuala Lumpur. He wants to get RedQ into service by next year, building a fleet of 24 aircraft within a few years. [There are also plans for additional joint-venture budget airlines in Japan and possibly China along with the ill fated joint venture between Jetstar and Vietnam.]
Part of Mr. Joyce’s blueprint is to restore the international operations of QANTAS to profitability within three years and to be able to meet its cost of capital in five years. I suspect that if Alan Joyce fails to meet those targets he’ll be looking for another job.
QANTAS flights returned to normal by mid afternoon on Tuesday November 1.
WHAT YOUR BEER SAYS ABOUT YOU
Clothes maketh the man. You are what you eat. These shibboleths are largely discounted, but now there’s a new one. It’s what your favourite brand of beer says about you.
Readers of Sydney’s ‘The Daily Telegraph’, one of Rupert’s Rags, may have tripped over a small article on research into beer brands conducted by Melbourne’s Deakin University. The research, in part, describes drinkers of Victoria’s main beer brands in these terms:
VB (Victoria Bitter) Popular with the working class, budget shoppers, pizza lovers and those who watch ‘Dancing With The Stars.
Carlton Draught. Drinkers of this beer prefer fish and chips and V8 Supercars.
James Boag. More your high-income, department store shoppers who enjoy live theatre.
Coopers Pale Ale/Stella Artois. Book worms who are addicted to ABC and SBS news programmes.
Popular beers in N.S.W., Queensland, W.A., S.A., N.T., Tassie have not been ranked, presumably, as Deakin University is based in Melbourne.
Source: The Daily Telegraph, 22/10/2011.
A biased and unscientific overview of beer drinkers in the Philippines, would look something like this.
San Miguel Pale Pilsen. Older, more traditional beer drinkers. Many retirees and others think a day without an ‘SMB’ is a day wasted. SMB drinkers are often pot-bellied and dressed in shorts, flip-flops and singlets, dragging Angeles City’s image further down market if that’s possible. Shop at Johnnies or JJs
San Miguel Light. Popular with the image conscious, more affluent younger set who love the long neck bottle. Phallic symbol or wishful thinking? Self perception is that of a future high flier with aspirations to politics, an industry where self aggrandisement is legendary and no qualifications are needed. Shop at Marquee Mall and up-market brand name boutiques.
Red Horse. Common among the poor and those who want to get pissed quickly and cheaply before fighting, knifing or shooting fellow drinkers. A favourite Ladies Drink in low end bars and clubs. Shop at Nepo Mart for items they’re not clever enough to steal.
I know. It’s narrow minded, uncultured and stupid, but it’s also fun to imagine who people are, what they think, how they behave and where they shop by observing their favourite tipple. Indulge me while imbibing a glass or two.
AUST. LIFESAVERS ON PHILIPPINE BEACHES
Those red and yellow lifesaver caps common to beaches throughout Australia will be seen in Boracay. A group of Australian lifesavers will shortly travel to the Philippines to establish a surf lifesaving club and to raise water awareness after 6,000 children drowned here last year.
Cudgen Head Surf Life Saving Club chairman, David Field, is one of the lifeguards who’ll spend 18 months in Boracay teaching locals to become lifesavers. After Boracay the programme will be extended throughout the country.
As someone taught to swim before I could walk I’m amazed that so few Filipinos can swim and so many are uncomfortable in the water. Quite damning in a country of 7107 islands, is it not?
BACKPACKERS
I’ve never been a backpacker. I was fortunate to do most of my youthful travel in comparative comfort and with porters to carry my bags.
I have a grudging respect for those young men and women who traipse ’round the world hefting backpacks as big and as heavy as those carried by the military in combat zones. I just wish they wouldn’t clout me about the head with their packs when getting on and off public transport. Being whacked on the nut with a 70 pound backpack is painful and shows scant regard for the welfare and comfort of others – especially grumpy old men, such as moi.
Tourism, however, owes a large debt to the legions of youthful trekkers who’ve discovered hitherto hidden and undeveloped destinations in many countries. Boracay, for example, was a popular backpacker destination long before the middle class and the conglomerates turned it into the type of place no backpacker can afford.
I, of course, could never be a backpacker. I’m far too well mannered.
RUGBY WORLD CUP
Phew. New Zealand defeat France 8-7 to win the R.W.C. for the first time since 1987.
It was not an easy or convincing win. The French tackling and pressure was superb, they controlled territory and possession for much of the game, looked dangerous with the ball in hand, but only once broke through the rugged New Zealand defence to cross for a try.
The All Blacks were not allowed to play well. They were harried, harassed and hustled by the French, made uncharacteristic errors and missed a couple of straightforward penalty goals. N.Z.’s sole try came from a wonderful set piece play following a line-out. As the game progressed I began to think they’d choke, and fold, as the French were relentless with their tackling: but the Kiwi’s held on, just.
A draw, with joint holders of the William Webb Ellis trophy, may have been the fairest outcome, but it was not to be.